Negatives

Not a bead glistens my eyelashes when I am in intractable trauma,
But can’t stop my surging tears at higher r_gamma;
Am I weird?
I crave and miss my loved ones, whom I cannot see,
Is it because they are no longer there for ME?
Am I selfish?
I wish to pull the moon and wrap it around,
I long to get hold of Aladdin’s magic lamp to fulfill my wishes unbound;
Am I immature?
Death scares me, Rejection scoffs at me, Expectations tense me, Luck has forbidden me
The fear of losing my kith and kin terrifies me;
Am I a coward?
Am I weird, selfish, immature and a coward?
So many negatives huddled in a pod,
Am I a pessimist?